It always starts the same. A new morning in the studio...
A lovely list of things to do. Looming deadlines, and exciting things goin' on here and there. An untidy house, and chomping at the bit for some musical note news...
The light of twinkling stars bounces off the walls, as coffee brews...
Everyone gets dressed, or stays in their little house on the prairie nightgown... Noone minds, and the owls are sleeping, so they won't notice... The only rule left to follow is, wear the costume of your hearts greatest desire...
On this very day, I found my morning rituals of making sure things were semi-tidy, and the birds were where they were supposed to be, very difficult. I was giddy. I was excited, I was overwhelmed.
We had been in search of new piano keys to reside in our country home. The girl just can't live without a piano. It isn't possible (just don't tell the upright bass(es), the guitars or the mandolins). Not one more breath can be taken without a large playable creature in the country. She missed her pianola like crazy. But La Pianola, was not intended for the country house. She was a city girl - and resided at the little city house...
The evening before this giddy day, Mister Lovee knocked on the door to my very private boudoir. He slowly entered, his hands behind his back.
She heard a faint tune. So beautiful and haunting...
She sat up in bed, as Mister Lovee's face glowed with joy. She said "I am already overjoyed, please show me..." A gift. A tiny wooden Grand Piano made in Spain. The same shape as the piano they hoped to own in the coming days...
She couldn't help it. She felt her emotions overflow. They poured out. She cried and cried. She cried some more. Could he really be so totally lovely she thought, as she gasped for breath. She looked his way, as he took out his handkerchief, and blew his nose, for he was brought to tears as well...
To be loved. All anyone ever wants. To love and for the love to be reciprocated.
And, it was... Her heart runneth over...
You see, she liked older things. Mister Lovee included. So, he went to see a man about an old grand piano. And they fell in love with it. And maybe, just maybe, this piano had the character and spirit that the girl longed for...
Mister Lovee and the girl, were so very alike. It just blew her mind. She felt thankful, and lucky, and at times, even a sense of disbelief. That she had such goodness in the form of a Mister Lovee, in her life...
For 8 and a half years, they laughed, cried and got annoyed at all the same things. Two peas in a pod.
So, like I said, on this very day, when she was giddy, and had a laundry list of things to do, but couldn't wait for news on the piano - she spent her time talking to a piano rebuilder, then her piano tuner, and learning about a humidity controlling piano device all morning...
And while she took a break for brunch, she read a few blogs. And her day started to unravel in a different direction. Even this blog post changed...
On this day, she went to see how Stephanie Nielson was doing. She checked up on Stephanie, and her family and Carol Decker, quite often... She thought about those two families, everyday it seemed...
The truth is - she wanted to say something ages ago about her feelings and prayers for those families. She just didn't know how to. But today, after checking up on these amazing people, she had to burst out of the house... She ran and skipped and took off barefoot...
Maybe today was the day?
She wondered if Mister Lovee would mind her telling you a tiny bit of their story...
About loving someone, to the core. About how love saves you. About, being there, even when all the petals have fallen...
She couldn't quite remember how long ago it was? Was it three years? 2 years? 4 years? She didn't like to think about it...
But, a few years ago - Mister Lovee was driving down the highway, when a tiny little 90 year old lady pulled off the side of the road (the shoulder) where she had been parked, onto the highway, right in front of Mister Lovee's car. He never imagined, that the car he saw parked on the shoulder of the highway, would turn to face the traffic and drive directly through the highway, in a T shape.
In a split second, his car spun, and twirled and twisted, and turned into a bent piece of metal.
All this, as Mister Lovee's bones shattered...
He was on his way to Denver for business. Bags packed. He had his head set on, and was talking to the girl (me) - who heard the entire accident.
She still had nightmares about it. And her brain blocked a lot of the sounds that caused her to faint that day. While a friend picked the phone up off the floor. She felt like she was in a tunnel. She heard Mister Lovee screaming, screaming, sreaming... And her body felt limp and weak...
Soon recovered, she was in her car, racing to the site of the accident.
It was bad.
The police let her collect all of Mister Lovee's items from the car as an ambulance drove away with him in it...
She raced to the hospital. Shaking. Nervous. Sick. Crying.
Alone.
She couldn't call the only person she knew to turn to. Him...
She had to be strong.
He was in terrible shape, covered in that terrible air bag powder. Desperate for water that he couldn't have...
His pelvis was shattered and they couldn't operate. All they could do was put him to sleep, and try to set his leg bones back into place and hope they stayed still... Little pelvis shards, floated around...
He would have no hip socket. His leg would have to be held in by ligaments and muscles (hopefully). The hospital stay had just begun...
The first time they tried to get him to walk, it seemed like an impossible task. She helped him down a long white hallway, and at the end, a picture window held a fuchsia Arizona sunset.
Less than half way there, his shoulders dropped. He looked down. He broke down. His arms shaking as they held his body weight up, on a walker.
She felt emotions she didn't know she had. She kissed his cheek.
"You can do it Lovee, I know you can..."
This went on as weeks past.
Finally he was able to leave the hospital. A walker, crutches, and her, would be his support group...
She alone, had prepared the country house. A special chair, a special toilet seat (she was proud of that installation). A special this and that. He was in a body brace. It was a very delicate and precarious situation.
He needed a new wardrobe to fit the body brace...
She was alone, and had never cared for anyone in her life.
She was so scared.
But time, time is alway a good friend.
She was by his side without nary a move for 3 and a half months.
Noone came to see them... And she always told everyone that everything was just fine...
Somedays seemed tragically overwhelming. Other days, were a gift from the heavens.
She went out to the sanctuary. She cried on her knees. She begged for a taste of their lives as they used to be...
"Just one day. Please God, just one day..."
More and more time past. Luckily he was strong and healthy, and determined.
They cried often. He felt, the man he once knew was lost to him. She consoled. She held on to him...
It was a terrible blow to him. That was true...
But they became closer than ever.
He changed.
She changed.
Time healed.
And today, as tears stream down, from all those memories and moments, too deep, too delicate, too intense to be able to fully remember... She feels, feels for the Nielson's and the Decker's. Whose situations are even greater and more intense than what Mister Lovee faced. And she sheds a deep seeded tear for Stephanie and Carol, and for their families.
She escaped the house when the emotions visited today, and returned to that safe little place in the garden...
The sanctuary...
All you have in the face of tragedy is love from those around you, prayer, hope, and time...
So you see. This little blog post, took a funny turn. Maybe now you see litle bits of, how and why I embrace life as I do. The silly moments, the fun moments, the ridiculous moments. I know how sacred they are, how special they are...
I know, that spending time being negative or sad or worried or stressed and angry, is not a place I want to be. How can I? I longed for today, this day, so ardently when Mister Lovee was injured, and I remember that everyday. It catapults me into seizing the day... Even if all that means is reading in the sunshine, and taking it easy...
I am outrageously thankful, that Mister Lovee is, besides being broken inside, pretty much, back to normal. Our life is normal again. You would never guess by looking at him, that any such thing had occurred...
Is our life how it used to be? Funny - I don't remember. All I know is that where we are now is lovely, and it is our normal. And we embrace each other and every minute of life...
I hope and pray, that in time, Stephanie and Carol, may feel the same. That they will find a new normal, where peace and joy embraces them...
I can't imagine how they feel. As I wasn't the one injured in our case. Not physically. But I understand a little bit, of what it's like, to be skipping along, and have a heavy log thrown in your road...
And what it's like, to go around it, and find a new path...
Many ♥♥♥♥'s, V
Title taken from these lyrics...
