I wanted to take a moment to share my tale about the last year with you...
Before time escapes like petals in the wind.
A tale about a garden I set out to build at the beginning of the pandemic -
And of how it saved me during my year of solitude.
I'd like to share my journey that began in March of 2020 with a sense of mutual respect, based on my own experiences.
I was quarantining at my other house, not the country house (which I am now back at regularly), during the last year.
Many of you who have known me and my blog for a few years have been here through the many many gardens I have built at the country house.
The garden is still alive and well at the country house, but it needs me less because it is established.
I've built so many gardens, such as vegetable gardens surrounded by 14 foot sunflowers.
Over a dozen pumpkin patches.
(all available in the archives)
Flowers and gophers and hives and gourds and edibles galore.
But most importantly, it builds peace and beauty and hope and joy on so many different levels.
I discovered that I loved gardening when I was 19 years old, and have used it as a great source of mental health.
When all hope seems lost, the garden reminds you - hope is never lost, especially on a nurtured seed.
And so, in March of 2020, with a hearty dose of worry and dread I decided I should do something to keep me sane.
Behind the walled in backyard of my house was extended land that I had fenced in for the dogs in 2018.
There was a citrus grove with a tight fence around it on one side, which I removed and expanded for the boys to have a place to run and play.
The rest of the area was rolling hills and a whole lot of brush and cactus, which some men removed when the dogs kept getting thorns.
Because of that I had a blank slate of dirt and rocks to keep me really busy out back.
I call it, the secret garden behind the garden.
I started with a tiny area for a vegetable garden up against a small hill.
I quickly expanded that to be a tiered garden and I took out my adrenaline of worry (comes easy to me) on the very rugged and rocky hills.
Leveling little hills with my dandy flat head shovel.
In my wildest dreams, I never imagined what would transpire over the next 427 days.
That one little vegetable bed, which I will share photos of below, started me on this grand journey of building a big, lush, and full garden.
I did not plan it, I didn't even expect it.
Because I was going to no stores I ordered seeds from all sorts of companies online.
For the last 20 years I have been trying to grow poppies, and they simply never take.
I should have known I was heading into a gift of nature when they all sprouted...
But wait, before I tell you about the 4 foot poppies...
And the wildflowers that make me feel like I am in wonderland -
(I live in the high desert and not the English countryside, so I might get a little overzealous)
Oh, and the bees that are so utterly overjoyed...
I must first show you what this entire space looked like before.
Yes, if you can believe it, it was rolling hills of dry brush and cactus.
And now, the same view above, looks like this below...
To me it is some kind of dream, mainly because I went in with no expectations.
But mostly because this project kept me company when I needed it the most.
And, I never really set out to build something so green and full, I just needed to keep busy in the peaceful outdoors when the world seemed so chaotic.
The garden just evolved on its own, and is still evolving to be sure.
The space I began with, and the hill I put the little original vegetable garden in, can be seen below.
It is surrounded by burlap on the other side of Miles.
That was my sad little vegetable garden that I began with.
One year later, the same exact location looks like this below.
I did it all myself with no help, just me and my shovel and boulders I found in the desert for stairs.
It's not perfect, and it's a little messy like me, but it does my heart good my friends.
The reason I wanted to share this with you is because, it is proof that with hope and nurturing, there are endless things we can achieve.
It just takes some dedication, and even though you can not see where you are being led to, if you work hard and put your heart into it wonderful things will unfold for you.
My garden isn't the best most spectacular garden in the world, but that isn't even the goal.
The goal for me was a place to keep from the sadness I found myself in during the pandemic.
I was separated from everyone I loved, as most of us were.
I lost many friends and family members.
And hardest of all, Miles (my 10 year old dog and baby) was dying of cancer.
My garden had to save me, there was no other choice.
There was nowhere else for me to go, but this dry plot of earth beckoning me, sort of convincing me that I should till it.
I was like Alice, sobbing in my sea of tears many days.
But hoping and praying deep down inside for better times ahead.
And blocking a lot of it out by quietly digging in dirt, day after day after day.
My body was bruised and tired.
My back was sore.
But I was floating and not sinking.
My garden was (is) my life boat.
It was the case 20+ years ago and it still is now, today.
Last summer the garden was okay, it had a big pumpkin patch and a lot of new little cuttings and seeds I was nurturing.
But as they say, a lot of the gardening happens in fall and winter, especially in my zone and location (high desert of Arizona, zone 8b/9a).
I planted most of my wildflower seeds in November, December and January.
I planted all my bulbs a day before my birthday on December 10th.
I had Miles by my side (my golden retriever with terminal cancer), and he seemed pretty well.
He had lasted a year longer than predicted and was by my side with every seed and bulb I planted.
But then, on December 12th my paternal grandmother died and on December 16th Miles went down hill fast and also died.
I won't go into my pain and agony, but I will say...
What slowly ensued beginning in February 2021, to me, was nothing short of a miracle.
After a year of toiling, with a heavy heart and worry about the unknown, something began to shift.
Poppies began to emerge everywhere.
Everything I had planted was pushing up through the earth.
Thousands of seedlings reached up to the sun everywhere.
I was used to losing almost everything to birds and critters before, but I had been extra careful to protect everything.
I watched them growing in beautiful shades of green, and budding while reaching for the sky.
Slowly unfurling from their curious and magnificent pods.
And not just one or two or ten, but hundreds.
So many, that even as I type this, I can not fathom the poppy magic that is currently happening.
You see, when you are a garden lover...
An obsessed lover of all growing things, you have these dreams -
You ask yourself, imagine if this or that would grow?
You dream of what could be.
Gardening really is all about hope and a dream.
For me, the gophers and rabbits always made things very difficult at the country house.
But, if there is one thing I have learned in this new garden it is that, a fenced in garden area and wire cloches do wonders.
(and bonus, it is very rocky here, so the digging is not that easy for underground critters)
It seems that everything I planted grew.
I didn't do anything over the top special.
I just got up bright and early every morning to make sure seeds were watered and safe.
I used organic soil and kept them hydrated, but besides that, it's the sunshine that did all the work.
Because it is the desert I am cautious with my watering, and when it finally gets hot, most of these will die back and the more heat tolerant plants will continue.
But for now, we have all of this, and it is nice and cool outside this weekend.
If a garden can truly hear you, as they say plants can, they must have heard me.
That or they really like 70's soft rock music, because for some reason that is all I was able to listen to the last year.
It made me feel less alone, crazy as that sounds.
I could be in the sunshine and dirt and all of a sudden Ace would come on or Paul Davis, or always Journey, and I'd feel like a kid again - and I felt okay.
From the moment the sprouts started growing, which you can see in previous posts, I just marveled at them.
And then, things just kept getting taller and taller and...
Lusher and lusher.
And before you know it, winter had ended and spring had begun.
I wondered what would happen next in my life.
But the one thing I had, whenever everything else has been an unknown, was the hope my garden was gifting me.
A reason to get up early and breathe the fresh morning air.
I have been waking up so early to tend my gardens for so many years now, it's become second nature to me.
And even though I was alone in my gardening, I wasn't totally alone because I had Matty with me and the endless birds and bees.
Of course, gardening and painting are a one person show most of the time, which you do alone - but the pandemic brought on a different kind of feeling when you actually can not see the ones you love.
I know many of us feels differently about this last year, so all I can say is, it's best to just respect one another's feelings.
As they say, best not to say anything at all, if you don't have anything nice to say right?
I can only share the experience of my own life.
And how, somehow in my endless well of feelings, a secret garden emerged...
And it held me tight.
It comforted me.
It kept me company.
It gave me hope.
It kept me healthy and sane.
And then, it gave me a whole bunch of flowers -
And continues to do so.
Everyday there is something new blooming, something more to look forward to.
A garden can save you in so many ways.
It will amaze and delight you if you love it and care for it.
It will show you the most incredible botanical specimens.
Like tissue paper art, just bobbing in the breeze.
It will overwhelm and delight you.
And sometimes, you might not even believe it is real.
And so, somehow I built a sanctuary for Matty and I.
And just as it was in full bloom, we all were able to see each other again.
Even though I still tend my garden alone, I am now able to return to my country house.
To those I love.
And, my heart feels a little lighter.
Just like that, I am more able to enjoy the delights of my garden.
My garden that undoubtedly saved me, again -
And then, as to say hello, it showed me its face.
I am more than quite certain, your garden can show you its face in different ways.
Mine has a very frog like face, with two eyes made out of poppies.
Can you see it?
So, here I am typing you this sort of letter about my garden and my year.
I never thought in March of 2020 that I would have built this big garden a year later.
There are moments I lay under the moon in my garden, and wonder if it is real.
I get up just as the light is coming over the mountain, and shoots hazy dreamscape beams through the trees and flowers, and I marvel at it all.
I will forever and always be in awe of nature.
I had many philosophical thoughts this last year, and the one that continues to return is -
One of the many reasons (but an important one) for our existence is to enjoy the splendors of nature.
It is one of the greatest gifts of all.
It is free, it is always there, and it is all around.
I'm content in doing my part for the endless bees and hummingbirds that enjoy the flowers.
For all the baby birds that have been born in my garden this year.
For the quail that jump over the fence every evening to cuddle up in my garden together because they know they are safe.
To be able to assist the creatures of nature in any way is my greatest joy.
The garden has saved me many times.
And it saved me this last year, when I needed it the most.
Proof that you can in fact, build a full cottage garden in one year.
No matter how big or how small, I recommend it to each and every one you.
If you get the chance at some time in your life to have any sort of plants of your own, I encourage you to try it.
If it is something that calls your name, you will love it.
There are ups and downs in growing things, but it is utterly rewarding.
I know many of you already have beautiful gardens, big and small, or have had them in the past.
So you understand all this botanical talk, I'm sure.
Thank you for letting me share my long tale with you, of the last 427 days and counting.
Of the secret quarantine garden I built during one of the hardest years many of us have had.
Let's just continue to do our best and be hopeful for the future.
And have respect and compassion for one another.
Lots of love from me to you!
Love, Vanessa
